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Thread: Glupi i kratki vicevi

  1. #1601
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    Stoje dve plavuše na parkingu i pokušavaju da otključaju svoj Mercedes sa spajalicom.
    • Jao, nikako ne mogu da otključam...
    • Požuri malo, počinje kiša a krov nam je spušten!
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  2. #1602
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    Pitaju cigu kako će da da ime sinu, a on kaže Zidan...
    − A zašto Zidan?
    − Pa dobar je fudbaler, faca je a i u pjesmama se pojavljuje.
    − U kojim pjesmama cigo?!
    − Pa, prolazi noc, prolaZidan...
    nothing comes from violence and nothing ever could

  3. #1603
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    Anđelina u buregdžinici:
    -Dajte meni samo jogurt, a za Breda pita.

  4. #1604
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    Pobila se dva tipa na ulici. Usred tuče naiđe policajac i razdvoji ih.
    • Kako se zovete?
    • Zoran Petrović! - kaže prvi.
    • Zoran Mihajlović! - kaže drugi.
    • Sram vas bilo, braća pa se bijete!
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  5. #1605
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    Razgovaraju dva drota nakon vecernje skole pa ce jedan:
    "I tako, na Marksu mozda ipak ima zivota..."
    Kad ce drugi: "Budalo ne kaze se Marks nego Mars,
    a to da ima zivota je samo hipotenuza".
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCjwxItb_p4
    Les chiens aboient, la caravane passe.

  6. #1606
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    Sexsaju se Crnogorac i Crnogorka
    Crnogorka: A jel usooo?
    Crnogorac: Meni se cini da jes'
    Crnogorka: E pa onda .......jaooooo....
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCjwxItb_p4
    Les chiens aboient, la caravane passe.

  7. #1607
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    du dva klikera ulicom a prvi kaže:
    -Pazi kaktusssss.
    A drugi će:
    -Glupane,nismo mi u tom vicu.
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  8. #1608
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    Ganja pas mačku ceo dan, ganja i ganja i kada je gotovo stigao, mačka pobeže na šljivu. Pas stoji ispod šljive i gleda u mačku pa će mački:
    • A kud na šljivu, ***** te strašljivu...
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  9. #1609
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    Facebook:

    -Status veze:*slobodna*
    -Šta je bilo..?
    -Upoznali se uživo...!
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  10. #1610
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    zašto je makarona šuplja?
    da možeš da dišeš kad se daviš.
    nothing comes from violence and nothing ever could

  11. #1611
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    Sretnu se dva pijanca i prvi kaže: 'Oprostite, mogu li proći između vas dvojice?'
    'Svakako, ali samo jedan po jedan.'

  12. #1612
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    Doshao Gibonni kod vulkanizera i govori:"I ove dvije duusheeee..... na na na na... na na na na na naaa..."
    GAME OVER!!!! Utuljuj Ligu Šampiona, IGRICA JE OBRNUTA, dajte nešto novo!

  13. #1613
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    Ulazi policajac u knjižaru i čuje kako se kupac i prodavač svađaju.
    "Ja sam policajac, zašto se svađate?"
    "Ovaj traži bilježnicu s krugovima", kaže prodavač.
    Primi policajac čovjeka za uho i izbaci iz knjižare sa riječima: "Marš budalo nepismena, tko je vidio bilježnicu s krugovima!"
    "Hvala, hvala, što će te vi?", upita prodavač.
    "Dajte mi globus Hrvatske za treći razred."
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  14. #1614
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    Quote Originally Posted by KRKNA View Post
    Facebook:

    -Status veze:*slobodna*
    -Šta je bilo..?
    -Upoznali se uživo...!
    Podsjeća na mIRC vrijeme a :congratulatory:
    -> Forma za naručivanje online stvari <-

    Bugi Vugi tapši Raduj se!

  15. #1615
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    Pitali Cigu:
    - "Šta ćeš biti kad porasteš?"
    Ciga odgovara:
    - "Biću ženu, decu, tastu..."
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  16. #1616
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    Cigo: svi su mi sinovi sa M, samo mi je Mišo sa Š
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  17. #1617
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    Staje čovjek sa Priusom na pumpu:

    -"Sipaj mi pola litre dizela i stavi kap ulja u motor "

    -"Hoćeš li i da ti prdnem u gume ?"
    Last edited by Rakun; 14-09-11 at 17:32.
    "Ja i dalje čekam da mi dokažeš da je Sunce kancerogeno.", Bugi

  18. #1618
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    Pricaju 3 komsinice o svojim cerkama.Kaze prva:ufatila sam cerku sa cigarima,ne mogu da vjerujem da mi cerka pusi! Druga: ja sam moju ufatila sa pivom,ne mogu da vjerujem da mi cerka pije! Treca(najpametnija): ja sam mojoj nasla kondom u sobi... NE MOGU DA VJERUJEM DA MI JE CERKA MUSKO!
    nothing comes from violence and nothing ever could

  19. #1619
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    Crnogorac odlazi u banju, žena ga ispraća :
    - Hoćeš li mi biti vjeran tamo?
    a on će :
    - Okle znam, nijesam ja prorok!!!
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  20. #1620
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    - Jaooo, što su vam slatki blizanci. Da li su jednojajčani ili dvojajčani ??
    -Ovo je curica, a ovaj je dvojajčani
    "Ja i dalje čekam da mi dokažeš da je Sunce kancerogeno.", Bugi

  21. #1621
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    Zovu James Bonda na telefon... Javlja se on i pitaju ga :
    - Halo, James, gdje si?
    a on odgovara :
    - Evo me u Nici...BatajNICI!
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  22. #1622
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    Makedonac automehaničar popravio auto Hrvatu, pa ga ovaj pita:
    • Majstore koliko treba da platim?
    • Tri hiljade denara.
    • Kaži ti to meni u tisućama.
    • Šest tisuća!
    kontakt telefon 069837937(T-Mobile)


  23. #1623
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    Kako Mujo opisuje svoje porodično stablo?
    Pa prvo moj babo, pa đed, pa prađed, pa čukunđed, pa..međed!!!
    Sell the Vatican, Feed the World!

  24. #1624
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    Zašto plavuša u ponoć stoji na vrhu zgrade sa otvorenim sendvičem? Čeka zvijezdu majonezu.

  25. #1625
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    omg,wtf........................
    Risk , is what makes life worth living

    Never a failure, always a lesson!

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